And So the Sun Rose

I wish to share an experience I had about two years ago that has come to mean quite a bit to me. 

I was a junior in High School, which was a time in my life where I often felt dissatisfied. I am not really sure exactly what it was that frustrated me, but I think it was a mix of getting poor grades, being unsuccessful with women, and not really knowing what I had in store for my future. 

I took a lot of walks, and I still do. Walking helps me think clearly and calms me down to the point where I am no longer hysterical. 

I could walk for miles. I almost died one time because I got lost on the mountain I was hiking, but that's a different story. 

I also had several thinking spots that I could retreat to and contemplate whatever I had weighing on my mind. 

One morning I was feeling particularly disaffected. I was on my way to early morning seminary but I was once again running late. Rather than walk in half-way through the class I decided to go to one of my thinking spots where I could observe the sunrise, hoping that it would somehow lift my spirits. 

But as I sat there in the cold and waited for the sun to come up I could not shake my anxiety. I grew more upset if anything. 

Finally, sunlight began to illuminate the sky on the horizon. As it crested, the sun bathed all of Pasadena in golden light. 

I heard the patter of running feet come up and stop behind me. 

I turned around and saw a middle aged woman out for her morning run standing behind me, also watching the sunrise. She took off her hat to wipe the sweat from her brow and I noticed that she was completely bald. 

She smiled as she looked at me. 

"Beautiful isn't it?" She said. "This is my favorite view."

I didn't know what to say, so all I said was, "Yeah. Me too."

"Have a good day." She said as she smiled and continued on her run. 

I watched her run down the hill, around the corner, and out of sight. 

I looked back at the sunrise and it looked completely different. 

It seemed more significant somehow. Suddenly it was full of meaning, full of beauty. 

And for once I stopped thinking. I stopped worrying. 

Just as the sunlight exposed the valley before me in light, so were my anxieties and fears simultaneously revealed for what they really were. Nothing.

I don't know if that woman is still running, but if she isn't then she left something behind. 

Something good. 

And I'll never forget it. 

Happiness and beauty is always there if you choose to see it.